I have about 800 things that I would like to work on or improve upon or start doing. I can feel my all-or-nothing personality imploding at so many goals, so I decided to pick just one. My single resolution is hard to put into words, so allow me to explain with a story. During my last semester at BYU, I borrowed a movie from an acquaintance. In the hustle and bustle of finals and graduation and moving, I forgot to give it back. The turn-over in BYU housing is so fast that I had no way of finding her, so I sheepishly packed up the movie and we moved to Missouri. Luckily, she remembered and e-mailed me about it. I promised to mail it to her and TWO MONTHS LATER I finally did. Every time I'd see it on my to-do list, I'd say "Oh yeah, I still need to do that." Now, I should cut myself some slack. I had a newborn and leaving the house seemed like such a production, but I still should have done it sooner. For two months I saw "Mail Movie" on the list and everyday I would get that sick feeling that I still hadn't done it. This is also why I still have a box of unsent/unwritten wedding thank you cards. With each passing day it got bigger and darker and harder to do and now it has been too long. This isn't just a to-do list problem. It is a selfish lack of consideration. This year, I will not plague myself with unfinished, ignored, or avoided errands, especially when it affects other people. My sister summed it up perfectly with this post she wrote a couple months ago:
"Nothing is so fatiguing as the eternal hanging on of an uncompleted task."
--William James
I am taking the time this last week of October to finally complete several tasks that have been on my mind and my heart. I've decided that one of the keys to living in happiness and peace is to keep my promises: both large and small. When I don't, it weighs on my spirit. It saps my energy and weakens my resolve to do other things.
Find something (or someone, frankly) in your life that you have an uncompleted task for. Complete it. I promise the mental energy you spend thinking about how you haven't done it is far more difficult to live with than just doing it.
I borrowed a car seat from a person in our ward for the thanksgiving break. Then two and a half weeks AFTER I was supposed to have already given it back she emailed me asking if I was done using it. Her kids are older, so it wasn't like they needed it. But not giving it back in the time that I had said was almost like not appreciating their willingness to let me use it. I was so embarrassed at how lazy I had been. So don't feel like you're the only one with this bad habit.
ReplyDeletewhat was the movie?
ReplyDeletehah, i just wanted that to be the first thing you saw me comment with. but this is really good. it has unfortunately (or fortunately) reminded me of something i have yet to do. dang it.
ReplyDeleteLove you, Carly. So glad to know it's not just me. :)
ReplyDeleteWe have have a cassette tape...ok, who uses those anymore? from a guy for 16 years! We actually ran into him and told him about it. He had no recollection of even owning it. Sadly I still have it, and still feel guilty when I see it. I need to just throw it away. i don't even have a player to put it into! THIS...coming from a major purger, so don't feel too bad. We all have our skeletons ... or tapes ...or movies...or thank you cards in our closets. I say just throw them all away and forgive yourself...no one else cares or is even thinking about it!
ReplyDeleteWrong Buffy....I care! Send me the damn thank you card you little brat!
ReplyDeleteA. Men.
ReplyDeleteAnd is there ANYONE in the world who could get away with a comment like that except our Angeleah? Seriously, can you hear her laughing as she's typing it?
Okay, I can totally relate. Wedding thank you cards have yet to be finished. :/ And remember when I asked for your address like last month and you still haven't received anything from me? Yeah. Can you send me your address again? (I never wrote it down and all of my texts got deleted when I had to get my phone fixed.) I promise I will write it down and send you something.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I miss you. I hope this new year has been treating you guys well.